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March 14, 2009

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jude grimm

Abuse can come from many directions that often times unchecked becomes a "part" of a relationship that we thought was intended to be "all good". Be it a "friend" or a "romantic partner", the boundary of who we allow to participate in our lives has got to be a sustainable relationship. Would an animal that aligns itself for life choose a partner that was unable to assume responsibility of parenthood for lifetime? Do geese abuse each other? Do lions abuse each other? What is up with humans?
Vulnerability comes with an old recipe of self doubt, disbelief and a desire to be approved upon. Ultimately, it is about finding out who we really are and what matters to us most. Is it money, prestige or virtue of what we are here to contribute as a human being having a spiritual experience? You decide.

Anna Moss

There is much to say and more to understand about this social plague.

At root it is an indictment of parenting. Abuse and neglect during the first five years of life adversely affects brain development. These little boys who suffer as babies and toddlers grow up to abuse. Some of them abuse drugs, some women, some little boys and so forth.

The chances for change decline with the severity of the brain damage, which is demonstrated by the severity of the abuse he doles out. The brain damage explains the near 100 percent rate of recidivism for some pathologies.

It was this piece of information that helped me let go. Once I realized it was hopeless, my previously thwarted instincts for self preservation kicked in.

Abuse is a hard, hard lesson. In hindsight, I think it is also an indicator that a woman's self image is inadequate. Once you get your arms around all of this, you may realize you're in a position to take a big step.

I think that great adversity provides some sort of opening between the material and the spiritual world. What you do with that opening can be great. Could this be why so many extraordinary things have been created by people who were in severe circumstances?

Carolyn Osborne

I have been in abusive relationships in the past. My daughter never had to deal with my personal abusive relationships. Thankfully I'm not that same person and I have grown and have been able to pass on strength and personal power to my daughter. She is now 19 years old and although no boy ever physically assaulted her there were a couple that attempted to verbally assault her. Again, I say "attempted" because that young lady has been raised knowing that she must believe in herself, be strong, know to always listen to that "little voice" or her "gut" and know that she has every right in the world to be heard and her opinions must be respected by those around her or they don't need to be around her. Society unfortunately teaches that women should be weak and submissive and that it's cute and pretty to play dumb to get what you want. That is so wrong. We need to teach our girls and our boys that love, respect, honor, strength, intelligence are the ways that should be lived. On both sides. And if a boy or man or woman or girl assaults another you need to be away from that person and that person needs to seek help. YOU CANNOT FIX OR CHANGE ANOTHER PERSON. That is their choice. But you can choose for yourself to surround yourself with those that treat you well. But we have to start at birth. So parents need to teach this to our babies....not the schools. It is not their job. And if someone is in an abusive relationship they need to move on and up in life for themselves and/or their children. Make things right for the future.

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