Spirited Woman Blogger Team

Guest Blogger - Jean Campbell - Permission Granted…Bonus Time Beginnings are Realities!

This is Jean's final post in her exclusive three-part series for Spirited Woman. Jean is the creator of the very successful blog No Boobs About It, a two-time breast cancer survivor, and the former Director of American Cancer Society's NYC Patient Navigator Program.

In her second post - Jean wrote about giving yourself permission from treatment to survivorship. In this post she writes about how new beginnings are your opportunity to thrive.

After a few years of earning a living as a writer, I gave myself permission to start a company providing writing services for nonprofit organizations and small corporations.

One of these jobs was to put me in touch with hundreds of women who had survived breast cancer. These women came from diverse cultures, ranged in age from late twenties to midsixties and most had English as a second language. What most of them had in common was they were in the process of, or had made a new beginning after active treatment. Most spoke of becoming more assertive in their relationships, others took jobs outside their homes, some were getting their GED diploma others were taking college courses. A few had left abusive or loveless relationships.

Many of these women were “paying it forward” as volunteers in hospital clinics where newly diagnosed women received treatment. As survivors, they gave the gift of hope that only a survivor can give. They gave comfort to patients, speaking to them in their native language.

After treatment for my second breast cancer, it was time for new permissions and beginnings. The first beginning, the realization of a 20 year dream…a web site helping young children learn how to make good choices. Can Do Street, now in its second year, is for families with children 3-7 years.

Also in its second year, No Boobs About It, Inc., a nonprofit organization, helps women navigate breast cancer and survivorship by providing the most up-to-date information on research, resources and support services, via its web site, www.noboobsaboutit.org.

Guest Blogger - Jean Campbell - Permission, the Key to Every Beginning

Jean Campbell's continues her three-part series for Spirited Woman. Jean is the creator of the very successful blog No Boobs About It, a two-time breast cancer survivor, and the former Director of American Cancer Society's NYC Patient Navigator Program.

In this her second post - she writes about giving yourself permission - on living life prior to breast cancer, and what positive changes can be made transitioning from treatment to survivorship.

The long months of breast cancer treatment with their exhausting side effects are a great time to take inventory of how we have been living our lives and how we want to live post treatment. But, thinking and planning are only half of what it takes for a beginning. A beginning isn’t possible without permission.

We are adults. Whose permission do we need? We need our permission. And, giving ourselves permission isn’t always easy. It’s about entitlement. Are we entitled to change course? Do we have the right to do something just for us? What about our obligations to our family our job or any other responsibilities we may have?

We have just come through breast cancer. Family and friends have been there for us. Don’t we need to pay back their kindness and support by picking up our lives where we left off before cancer treatment?

Even if we wanted to, we couldn’t. Breast cancer, any cancer is a life-changing experience. Survivorship is a new place to be and we need to adjust to the concerns, issues and yes freedoms that come with being a survivor.

We find, without planning it, that we covet our time. If we want to waste it, that’s one thing, but we don’t want anyone else to waste our time. We want our time to count. We know that recurrence is always a possibility and we don’t want any regrets if that should occur. There is an urgency to do something meaningful, to make a difference for ourselves and perhaps for others.

A beginning can be dramatic with that start of a new career, a move, a new business. It can be incremental with small but significant changes such as taking a class, traveling or pursing new activities.

Whatever the beginning, it remains an idea, a plan, until you give yourself permission to make it a reality. Permission is an ongoing process. We may need to give ourselves permission many times before making a new beginning a reality. For most of us, breast cancer’s gift is that permission. We feel, maybe for the first time in our lives, that we have the right, that we are entitled, to do life our way.

Guest Blogger - Jean Campbell - Bonus Time…A Time for Beginnings

I met Jean Campbell through Twitter. The name of her blog No Boobs About It captivated me. When I reached out and spoke with Jean, I found out she is an educator, a two-time breast cancer survivor, formerly the Director of American Cancer Society's NYC Patient Navigator Program, a published book author -- and during the past 35 years, she founded five corporations and raised over 100 million dollars in grants! Thank god for Twitter.

Below is part one of her three-part weekly series exclusively for Spirited Woman on living life prior to breast cancer, and what positive changes can be made transitioning from treatment to survivorship.

Just before I finished treatment for my first breast cancer, my son and I were speaking about what I wanted to do when treatment was over; what beginnings was I planning. After I rattled off a series of conservative changes, my son cautioned me, saying, “Ma, you’re not on borrowed time. You’re on bonus time and you don’t spend bonus time the way you would ordinary time.”

Survivorship time, the time following treatment for any life-threatening illness, is bonus time.

Why? Because for most of us, a life threatening illness teaches us that time is the most important commodity we have. We take stock of how we are living and what we are doing with our time. We begin to think of our time as a survivor as a time to do what we’ve been planning to do, but putting off. We have a renewed interest and drive to make things happen. We’ve learned what we gave lip service to before our life-threatening illness but now know in our gut is true…no one is guaranteed the time to do everything they want accomplish or experience.

Breast cancer is a life threatening illness that packs an added wallop. Beyond the concerns that every cancer survivor feels, a breast cancer survivor may have to cope with long-term or permanent changes in her body image. Not every woman is a candidate for reconstruction. Some women’s hair will thin out during the five years of hormone therapy taken to prevent a recurrence of breast cancer. Still others will gain weight on hormone therapy. Others will experience long-term side effects of active treatment.

These physical changes can cause depression, doubts about femininity, interfere with existing relationships and the forming new relationships as well as impact on the self-confidence critical to career and personal development.