Pamelah Landers is a leading hand analyst and author. She specializes in relationship success and insights about your Life Purpose based on your never-changing fingerprints. She has read over 20,000 hands in her career.
In her fascinating 3-part weekly series exclusively for Spirited Woman, Pamelah explains from her perspective that it really is not about you and by understanding that you are on the road to self-love.
You may be familiar with this phrase: "It's not about you." I've been sharing it a lot recently, hearing myself say it out loud in conversations with others.
I know when I find myself repeating something frequently there is a message for me.
First, let's look at what this means, “It's not about you!"
When others compliment or acknowledge you, the comment is how they see you, from their perspective. You have a choice: you can believe it or not. Free will. It’s not about you although you can choose to take it personally. It’s always a reflection of what the other person believes or perceives about you. It’s their stuff.
If others make comments that feel like criticism, again, it is from that person's perspective. You can believe it or not. The principle applies regardless if the comments feel good to you or not. It’s not about you.
In the late 1980s I began some serious therapy to deal with what I suspected was sexual abuse in childhood. When I had memories of that and knew it was true, a long healing journey began. One thing my therapist said repeatedly that helped me hugely was, “it’s not about you.” It took hearing that statement multiple times (like 50!) applied to many situations before it sank in.
That’s how it is when a new concept comes into your life. It takes a while before it’s in alignment with your energy and is integrated in your belief system.
What I know from reading over 20,000 hands is that no two people have the same perspective about anything – exactly. No two hands are the same. You may have similar viewpoints, but maybe one statement in a conversation doesn’t quite ring with you. That’s normal. We are designed to have our very unique perspective. That’s why each person has their own hand design and no two match exactly.
Accepting this concept of “it’s not about you” is a step into radical self-love. When I remember to apply this, I can step back from whatever another is sending my way and tell myself the truth about what I know.
Part 2 is coming next week – some examples on how to determine what is or isn’t about you.
Pamelah Landers, a leading hand analyst and author, specializing in relationship success provides profound insights about your Life Purpose based on your never-changing fingerprints. She has read over 20,000 in her career helping people claim and live what they were born to do. Featured frequently on radio, Pamelah is able to help listeners - in a short amount of time - to identify their style of expressing love based on the Heart Lines in their hands. Pamela is featured in the Spirited Woman 2012 Directory: Resources for an Inspired Life.