During some of the most difficult times in my life, I can remember my grandmother telling me that someday I would look back at whatever the event was and laugh at it. Time has a way of passing quickly she would remind me and when you are much older you will only remember the good things. Well, she was half right.
Time does pass quickly, but I can’t say that all my memories are good. I can however admit that in hindsight the worst feelings do dissipate. It’s like labor. You know it hurt (and for those of you who have experienced it, you know that the word hurt doesn’t do it justice), but you can’t really remember how badly it hurt because if you could, would any of us purposely experience it again?
And yet, it wasn’t until I sat down to write these words did the following ever occur to me. We only need to touch a hot element once to know to never do it again. The same is true for sticking something in a light socket. What is it about this thing called motherhood that turns our brains to mush and plays with our memories?
I am the mother of three. I was very young when I married and had my first two children within the first two years of our marriage. I thought I was done. I was content with the fact of having a daughter and a son. My children were about nine and eight when I discovered that God had other plans for me. The greater irony was I found out on April Fool’s Day and couldn’t share the news because I knew no one would believe me.
It took me a few week’s past that date before I was finally able to do so. I had rehearsed the happy scene in my mind numerous times and so I was completely unprepared for having to search for a screw driver tiny enough to unlock my daughter’s bedroom door after she barricaded herself behind it saying she wouldn’t come out until I promised there would be no baby. OKAY, so that didn’t go as planned. The other thing I could not have planned as I attempted to coax her out of her room was the overwhelming love and completeness that our third child would bring to our lives. He literally became the child we all raised.
You would think that raising a third child would be easier after having the benefit of experience. I can guarantee you however it is not and that truth came flooding through me as I took my place in the passenger’s seat while watching my baby buckle himself in behind the steering wheel of my car. I have bought him every pair of shoes he has ever owned and yet I was totally unprepared when I noticed the size of his feet in comparison to the size of the gas pedal. When did they grow so large? As his massive foot awkwardly shot the car forward, I suddenly realized that for the first time in our lives he was completely responsible for me and every mail box between there and home.
My grandmother was right. Time passes quickly. Someday I’ll look back at this and as a wise, Spirited Woman I will laugh. Right now however all I want to do is barricade myself behind my bedroom door and not come out until he is a licensed driver. Teaching a child to drive is very much like a hot element. You only have to touch it once to know you never want to do that again. Unfortunately God has other plans for me.
Gina McNew, www.ItsHipToBeHot.com
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